strategies for navigating life as the only black graduate student in your program by roxane gay

STRATEGIES FOR

NAVIGATING LIFE

AS THE ONLY

BLACK GRADUATE

STUDENT IN YOUR

PROGRAM

by Roxane Gay

Congratulations! You join tens of other black graduate students at institutions across the country who dare to go where few persons of color have gone before. Below are some useful strategies that will help you cope with your unique position.
1. Your new graduate school colleagues will want to make you feel comfortable in this new environment. They will assume you are a. from the inner city and b. a rapper. As such, they will speak to you using Ebonics. They will use words or phrases such as yo, holla, wazzup, that’s gangsta, that’s so ghetto, and so on, but will do so in an exaggerated manner more caricature than anything else. It is likely you will have no idea what they are saying. In such instances, simply nod and smile.
These colleagues will also be prone to the use of diminutives such as girl or homey, the utterance of which may or may not be accompanied by a neck pop or finger snap. They may refer to you as my brotha or my sista. Faculty members will also exhibit such tendencies. When colleagues lapse into these behaviors do not be alarmed. Gently inform them that such gestures are unnecessary. Tell them that what they’re doing is the hallmark of the liberal racist. Explain liberal racism.
If this behavior persists, and it will, then apply the appropriate corrective—a resounding slap across the face. If they are upset by the corrective, appease them by saying something like, “It’s all good, yo. That’s just how we gangstas roll in my hood.” Generally, all will be forgiven. If not, you’ll certainly feel better.
2. At times, your colleagues will throw gang signs and otherwise contort their bodies in embarrassing ways. This may involve any combination of poses that include but are not limited to the resting of the chin between thumb and forefinger with their jaw locked and fingers flexed; a wide range of permutations of fingers up, down and manipulated to mimic various letters, prison poses with muscle flexing and other awkward simulations of the thug life. When they begin to throw their gang signs and poses, do not be alarmed. Back away, slowly, and head in the opposite direction. If there is a police presence in the vicinity, run.
3. You will often be consulted for your expertise on matters related to your race. Your colleagues will want to know your opinions on many issues ranging from reparations to interracial dating to discrepancies in penis size between men from different races. When, for example, you are asked why black people enjoy Tyler Perry movies, you might consider answering, “Because we were told to by the Negro High Council.” They will then ask about the NHC but simply tell them that it’s like Fight Club. You can’t talk about it.
4. Your colleagues will also ask you to serve as the sixth degree of separation between them and any black person they’ve ever met, known, or seen on television. If you hear the words, “Do you know [insert random black person’s name]?” say no at any time during the question and save everyone a little time.
5. You will be expected to incorporate race into your research whether you are studying mechanical engineering, biochemistry or English. If you aren’t researching race as it might apply to your field, your colleagues will ask, “Why not?” Answer a question with a question. Inquire as to why they are not incorporating race into their research.
6. At some point during your studies, your white colleagues, who may now be friends, will see their relationship with you as an excuse to air some of their grievances and concerns about various minority groups including yours. They may refer to you as an exception or cool or different and in those moments feel comfortable enough to say things that are prejudiced, racist and inappropriate. Always carry a voice recorder on your person so that if you accidentally lose control and commit assault or homicide, you have sufficient evidence to seek an acquittal.
7. Your colleagues will regard you as a priest. They will come to you for confession and absolution. They will tell you about each instance of racist behavior they have ever committed. They will tell you about their racist relatives, friends and lovers and those people’s misdeeds. When the confession is done, your colleagues will feel better about themselves. In return, tell them about the white man who owned your great great granddaddy, the white man who lynched your great granddaddy, the white man who stole your granddaddy’s patent and the white man who wouldn’t sell your daddy a house on the right side of the tracks. It’s practically the same thing.
8. More than once, you will hear either directly or through back channels that you are an affirmative action acceptance. If you have some kind of fellowship that is only awarded to people of color, your colleagues will find out and resent you. Laugh all the way to the bank.
9. Diversity is very important on the modern campus. You will be drafted for sitting on search committees, posing for photographs to use in recruitment materials and on university web sites, serving on focus groups about the diversity climate and advising the undergraduate black student group, if one exists. Learn to say no.
10. You will be expected to lead a departmental celebration of Kwanzaa as evidence of your department’s commitment to diversity and inclusion. Wikipedia offers useful information on Kwanzaa. Brush up on your knowledge of the holiday before December.
11. In rare instances, at some point during your five to eight years of graduate study, another black student will join your program. You will immediately be expected to a. like this person and b. become this person’s friend and/or lover because you both have so much in common. You’re both black!

Published on 11/4/09